Disappoint
by Everythingisawesome001
Summary: All Nico seemed to do was disappoint his father. And all Hades does is criticize him for it. What if Hades takes it too far one day? What if Nico decided he doesn't want to be a disappointment?


"Useless boy! Once again Percy Jackson has taken all the glory. And what did you do? You decided saving that bloody nymphs' life was better than the big win, Nico. Bianca would never had let that happen. I hope you're glad," Hades sneered at his son. Nico was kneeling in front of Hades throne wincing at the wound he had gotten during the apparently fruitless battle. Persephone watched from the throne right beside her husband's with a pleased smirk.

Nico winced internally while listening to his fathers' rant, never had he felt so small (Considering he was since gods were HUGE). Whenever his father had brought up Bianca he felt less inferior than he normally did. Once again Nico was being berated by his father for letting Percy save the day, again. A cyclops had wandered into the area near camp and didn't seem to be a good mood.

 _Flashback_

 _The cyclops groaned and let out a ferocious roar as it attacked the mess hall. Percy, Clarisse and Annabeth continued to attack it as it lumbered around. Nico grabbed his sword and went to help when he noticed a Naiad right in the way of the giant beast. She didn't seem to notice since she was watching to make sure the other campers were out of harm's way._

 _Nico ran to her just as the beast got to her and shoved her out of the way along with his body but he didn't completely miss the swipe. The cyclops was able to get a good skim at his ribs and he winced but didn't let it show any more than that._

 _The Nymph looked at him surprised and gave him a happy smile._

" _Thank you Nico, son of Hades, for saving my life," she chirped and Nico just nodded and stood up hearing cheering. The beast was nothing more than dust in the air and everyone had gathered around the three saviours. But they were more focused on Nico. They walked up to him and helped him up._

" _Nico man, you saved her. Great job," Percy says. And the others agree. Nico nodded and smiled. However the big accomplishment of the day went to them and when news reached Hades he wasn't very happy._

 _Flashback over_

Hades had always been a little upset with Nico. He could never be as brave as his daughter or as great as Percy Jackson and today just proved that. Nico was the odd one out and he wasn't fit to be a demigod according to his father. Nico was looking down upset and disappointed.

"Nico. I don't understand. Why can't you be the hero? All you ever do is disappoint me. That's all you have ever done and all you could ever do," he stated angrily. Nico looked up at his dad hurt, feeling his unbandaged ribs raw out at the sudden movement. He didn't have time to stich them up. Was that really all he felt towards his son, disappointment? But all he could see in his father's cobalt eyes showed loathsome, frustration and even annoyance. What about when he had summoned the army of death to help fight for camp Half-blood or when he was able to find Bianca. Did he not feel a sliver of pride to have him as his son?

"You know dear, what can you expect from him, he's never going to live up to Jackson. He's just too weak and he obviously takes after his mother too much. The woman couldn't even create a proper son," Persephone sneers. Oh no, his dad will never stand for an insult against his mother. But that part about him had stung.

"Perhaps you're right," Hades murmured making Nico's jaw drop open. He shakily stood up ignoring his bleeding ribs. Thank Zeus that he was wearing a black shirt and a black jacket so it wasn't noticeable. Never had his father ever let anyone remotely bad mouth his mother. The measly eleven-year-old bravely looked at Persephone that was looking all smug.

"Y-you can insult me all you want. But don't bring my mom into this," he then turned to Hades who looked at him emotionlessly, "And I'm sorry. For never being good enough for you and for never being able to please you. But I'm mostly sorry for… f-for not being the one that died i-instead of Bianca. For that I'm really sorry."

Hades looked at him surprised.

"I know that I'm not the son you wanted and I never can be. I know that I'm a screw up and a disappointment," Nico finished before shadowing his way out of the Underworld, leaving Hades in a state of shock. He had made his son feel like he was better off dead and he could feel the slight sting of guilt.

"Relax love he's just being overly melodramatic. He'll be over it," Persephone cooed. Hades nodded and pushed the guilt away. Perhaps she was right.

…

Hades landed in his cabin at camp feeling breathless, cold (it was near the end of fall), hungry (he had skipped lunch and dinner) and above all useless. He look outside of his window at everyone sitting around enjoying dinner. Not even noticing that he was missing. Probably not even caring.

No one cared for him. The only people that did were dead. For the first time in a while he felt some tears running down his face. And for the first time ever he didn't let them stop. His own _father_ hated him. He was never happy with him. He couldn't please him and that hurt. He wanted to stop the pain.

He glanced at the dagger that he had received from Chiron. Maybe…

He picked up the dagger and placed it over his wrist. Thalia used to do it and it seemed to make her feel better.

One cut for his mother. She was amazing and he missed her like crazy.

One for his sister. He was sorry for knowing she died and not being able to do anything about it. For being a poor version of her.

One for his friends. For never being as advanced as them and for almost killing them.

And the rest for his father. For never being able to live to his expectations and for being useless. He was sorry for being nothing more than a loathsome disappointment.

Each cut became harder and harder. The blood practically gushing out of his wrist and he almost smiled a sick twisted smile if the pain wasn't too much. He felt lightheaded. The blood loss was now making him sleepy.

 _Am I going to die?_ He wondered. Maybe it was for the best, he wouldn't be a burden to his dad anymore. Maybe he could make him happy from the other side. He would have pondered on it but all had already gone black.

He feel to the ground hitting his head kind of harshly, the dagger slipped out of his hand. A certain nymph was on her way to thank Nico once again for saving her and she heard the thump. She knocked on the door but it wasn't opening. She didn't see him at dinner so where else could he be?

"Nico. I brought you a gift, please open up," The Naiad pleaded. She was now impatient. Water nymphs were not known for their patience or lack of curiosity. She opened the door revealing the pale Nico with blood gushing from his wrist and the dagger beside him.

"Nico!" She screamed, running to his side, dropping her gift. Percy, Grover and Annabeth heard the commotion and ran to the cabin. Chiron also heard and trotted over as well.

"Erwiana what…" Chiron began before he saw for himself what had happened. He ran over to Nico and picked him up. Percy and Annabeth watched worriedly while Grover tried to keep back the masses huddling around the cabin back. Chiron ran him to the Big House. Placing him down, Annabeth ran over and checked his pulse.

"He's losing way too much! We need to bandage these up fast!" she said panicking. Percy grabbed the bandages while Annabeth started to apply pressure to the wound. Even Dionysus had put his hate for the kids aside to grab some nectar and ambrosia for Nico, trying to get him to swallow. It seemed to help because he let out a light groan letting them know that he wasn't too close to death. But the only thing on everybody's mind was why. Why would he do this to himself?

Erwiana had taken off his jacket to cool him down after Dionysus finished feeding him. She noticed the slight crumbling of blood on it. She gasped and Chiron lifted his shirt revealing 3 purple gashes.

"Oh no. That cyclops…" he mumbled. Annabeth looked at him for an explanation.

"He had venom in his claws. And he probably scratched Nico. Thank Zeus that it didn't go deeper than it already did or he could've died even faster," Chiron said trying to figure out what to do. But Erwiana was already on work for that, she waved her hands over the wounds. They immediately started to lose their purple tinge.

Water Nymphs had the power to extract venom and Erwiana couldn't have been happier for her powers until now.

Within the next hour the wounds had been bandaged and the ambrosia and nectar were starting to take effect. Erwiana refused to leave his side. But then she realized that there was one person that should be informed of this and she wanted to deliver it because she knew that if it wasn't for Nico, she would be the one with the venom, maybe worse. She couldn't extract it from herself so who could have? She would have died.

She bravely flashed herself to the underworld. Right outside of the throne room. The guards sneered at her, unhappy that such a source of life had dared make its way into the lair of death. Nymphs usually didn't come to the Underworld so it made Erwiana unsettled.

She walked into the throne room and bowed before the lord of Death.

Hades looked at her expectantly. Persephone did also.

"Lord Hades of the Underworld," she greeted, looking up. Hades gestured for her to rise.

"What brings a Nymph to the world of death?" he asked coldly. The exact symbol of life in the underworld was uncommon.

"Lord Hades, you're son, Nico, is in a critical condition. He…" she began before Hades rose startling her. Hades cool front confused her.

"What is it that happened to him, Nymph," he demanded almost in a bored tone. Erwiana expected more emotion from a parent who found out that his son was hurt terribly. But Erwiana didn't know what his cold father was thinking.

 _Probably wasn't able to keep up with training. Probably lost to Percy…again._ He thought.

Erwiana told him the story. From how he saved her.

"…and it must have triggered his senses. He began to cut himself. Quite deep. He tried to kill himself and he collapsed from combination of venom and blood loss and perhaps a concussion as well, but he is stable now. We got to him before he slipped. However, I was wondering that you could tell me why he did it? After all, you are his father," she ended. She expected an answer and when she didn't receive it she looked up at Hades who looked like he just committed a murder.

 _I'm mostly sorry for… for not being the one that died instead of Bianca._

That sentence ran through his mind. Hades did think that Nico would actually try to kill himself. Nico had always been strong, sarcastic and caring. He didn't cry when Hades had neglected his birthday, he didn't yell when he found out that Hades was prouder of Percy than his own son and he didn't mope whenever Hades insulted Nico. His head was always held high and Hades kind of admired him for that.

"Lord Hades?" Erwiana tried. She noticed that even Persephone had the decency to stay quiet. Hades was shaking but not out of anger, more like trembling.

"It was me. I'm the reason," he murmured before shadowing away to Camp Half-Blood. The water nymph followed distraught after that statement.

Just as she landed she found Hades hulking towards the Big House. The few demigods that were out at this time at night, looked at him confused but stayed out of his way. He was the lord of death after all. Erwiana followed him.

Chiron greeted him at the front with a bow.

"Where is my son, Chiron?" It sounded strange to say that. He almost never addressed Nico as his son and realizing it now made the pit of guilt rise.

"My Lord, Nico is still asleep and in a very weakened state. We are still feeding him nectar and ambrosia and it is slowly helping but I will take you to his room. We were lucky that Erwiana was able to get to him or…" Chiron trailed off.

"J-just take me to Nico," he demanded uneasily. Chiron nodded and they both walked silently to Nico's room with Erwiana in tow. Chiron stopped outside of his room.

"We'll leave you two alone," Chiron said leading Erwiana away. Hades hesitantly opened the door peering inside only to feel his guilt skyrocket.

His _son_ was lying there looking dead (and he would know what that looked like). He was paler than him and had thick bandages around his arm but he could still see the blood seeping through. His shaggy hair was all over the place and his breathing was slow and looked laborious. He also had a small bruise on his forehead from where he fell.

He slowly walked up to him and gently lifted his shirt you reveal another large batch of bandages. He pulled up a chair and sat down unable to take his eyes of the child of death in such a weakened state.

He looked back at everything he had said to Nico. At the time they were just words that he believed would get his son to up his game but now he realized that it was more than that. Those supposed "just words" had caused Nico to try and kill himself. There was no denying it. The death of his only child left would now have been on his hands.

He wished now that he was a better father, many of the gods never saw their kids and he had the chance to. He blew that chance and nearly got his kid killed in it. He snapped out of his thoughts when he felt some movement. Nico was shivering. Hades conjured a blanket and draped it over the unconscious boy, pulling it up to his neck. Then he pushed back all the hair on his face wishing that Nico could be more comfortable.

"You know Lord Hades, if it weren't for him, I would have been dead. He may not have been the hero of the day but he is my hero," a voice murmured. Hades turned to see the water nymph that Nico had saved.

"I went back to the Underworld and talked to Lady Persephone. She told me," she explained. Hades nodded. It was true. Nico never went for the glory, he never wanted it but he always found a way to help.

And instead of praising him on that, he insulted him on what he didn't do. Nico tried to make Hades happy but he never acknowledged him. All he ever did was compare him to Bianca.

"I know that now. He may not be the saviour but he's just a boy and doesn't deserve this. I know that," Hades murmured. Nico groaned and his eyes slowly opened. He tried to get up but Hades pushed him down. Nico looked at his father confused and closed off. Then he looked at the Water Nymph he had saved who just waved and walked out leaving him alone… with his father.

"W-what are you doing here, M-my lord," he asked nervously. Hades looked at him blankly, now that Nico was awake, he had a million questions for him.

"You tried to kill yourself," Hades stated bluntly causing Nico to flinch. He once again tried to sit up, stifling a groan of pain. He let out a noise of surprise when he felt two arms pulling him up gently, making the pain dull a bit. He silently looked at the bandages on his arm running a finger over them slightly.

"I wasn't… I wasn't…" he began.

"Don't try to tell me that you didn't, Nico! Just don't," Hades interrupted angrily. The ground around them began to shake, violently. Nico tried to keep still but it was hard because his father was making the ground hurl around.

"S-stop it hurts," Nico muttered. Hades immediately calmed down, he didn't want the wounds to reopen.

"Nico I have never been so…" he began harshly but he paused when he saw Nico begin to cry. His non-existent heart began to clench. Nico never cried in front of him. In fact, Hades didn't think that he ever cried.

"You've never been so disappointed. Because that's all you ever felt and all you'll ever feel. Yeah, I know. I'm pathetic and I can never be as great as Percy or Bianca. I'm sorry," he breathed out between sobs. Hades never felt so evil. He truly made Nico feel worthless.

"Worried."

Nico looked up through tears.

"I have never been so worried, Nico. Seeing you pale and almost dead…" he said quietly. He wasn't used to this. Being open about his feelings.

"I thought you wouldn't care," he said. Hades had barely caught it though. He didn't like that Nico thought he neglected him so much. It hurt to hear so much pain in his child and his disappointment was only for himself now.

"Nico I may be harsh, but I will always care. I promise you that. And… Nico I know that I say that you're a disappointment and I'm hard on you but the truth is that I couldn't have asked for a better son Nico. It took you almost dying but I realize it now," Hades stated with the most emotion Nico had ever heard.

"Really?"

"Really."

A few minutes of silence later, Nico spoke up, wiping away his tears.

"I didn't try to kill myself. I just wanted to get rid of the pain. Thalia was alright with it so I tried to as well. I guess I was a bit too hard," Nico said. Hades nodded.

"Never try it again. Or you will be cleaning out the Hellhound cages for the rest of your life," Hades said partially serious. Nico gave him a small but genuine smile. The first smile of his that the lord had seen in almost a century.

Erwiana had decided to make an appearance once again.

"Nico, I have a present for you," she chirped. She pulled a box from her back and handed it to Nico who looked at her curiously and then at his father who gestured for him to open it. It reminded him that he should also make up for lost time.

Nico slowly opened the box revealing a small black metal circle.

"It's a shield. Press that button in the centre," and Nico did. The small circle immediately fanned out to create a huge majestic shield decorated with symbols of the underworld and Olympus.

"This is amazing! Thanks," He said happily. Erwiana smiled happily.

"It's time for me to get back. Who knows what Persephone will do to the Underworld while I'm gone," he stood up and was about to walk out but he turned around to see Nico staring at all the designs on the shield.

"Be careful alright, I'll be back soon. And Nico, I am proud to have you as my son… Remember that," he muttered before shadowing away.

…

Two weeks later, Nico was nursed back to full health. His father hadn't visited after that one encounter so Nico decided to go visit him.

He landed in the Underworld and bowed at the throne. Hades immediately gestured for him to rise eying the bandages on his arm.

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine my lord," he replied.

"Nico you don't have to call me that anymore. Address me as you dad alright?" Nico nodded.

"Alright…dad,"

Hades nodded. Persephone rolled her eyes and pouted in her throne. Hades shrunk down to human size and kneeled to his son height. He then conjured a box out of thin air placing it in his son's hands.

"A great warrior deserves great weapons."

Nico opened the box and pulled out a pen like Percy's but it was black. He clicked it and it drew out into a giant sword that Nico stumbled back with a yelp. Hades steadied him and ignored Persephone's snickering.

"Thank you!" he said happily. He hesitantly wrapped his arms around his dad (after shrinking the pen again). Hades froze and Nico thought that he took it too far.

He quickly began to release him only to be pulled back. Hades pulled his son in tighter loving the feeling. Nico looked surprised at first but quickly melted into the tender embrace.

"You're welcome."

Hades finally realized how it felt to bring a smile to his son's face and he wanted to do it more often. He never wanted Nico to have a reason to not live and always wanted to feel proud of him.

"Let's go train," Hades said walking to the door with Nico right beside him.

 **The end! Thanks for readin!**


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